Garden Skills, Year Two

I have been working on keeping these beautiful plants alive and bug free this week. It’s been a struggle with the 100+ degree weather and trying not to use chemicals (aka organic). I am definitely excited about the first rose on my first rose bush.

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Spiritual Growing Pain

You know what a growing pain feels like, the kind you feel in your leg or arm?

Or imagine the HULK, right before he starts to turn green and his body begins to bubble and build, until BAM! he turns into the HULK.

Well, I’ve felt that way spiritually for awhile. The pressure has been building for years. It started as the small, gnawing pain, in my heart with thoughts that I was missing …something… but not sure what.

The last year that …something… has been building. It feels as though my spirit is waiting to burst out of its current state into …something… bigger. Yet, until I can fully realize what it is, it’s stuck. And it’s uncomfortable. I may be a yoga teacher and practicing yogi, I may be religious and attend church; but it doesn’t mean I’m perfect and ‘get it’ all the time. I feel at times I’m not allowed to share my present feelings because that would undervalue my ‘yoginess.’ Yet, ‘yoginess’ IS being in the present moment, being with the present feeling. And being non-judgemental about it. Even if it’s uncomfortable.

Yet, I did judge myself. I felt ashamed because as confident as I felt in my recent ‘life’ post, I wasn’t sure I could act. I fell into feeling unmotivated and purposeless.

And then I read this blog post:

All signs point to that I’m almost there, almost realizing my next stage in spiritual growth, becoming more clear on my life purpose.

UPDATE 5.25.2015

You have fallen for so many deceits. You can no longer trust anything you once knew.  You begin to realize that this quest will claim your life, and one blink later…

A little more clear after reading this post by Alison Nappi at Rebelle Society